Ah, Gluten. How I loved you so. You were “the one”, my absolute most favorite food group (sub-food group?). You made me so happy. You filled my life with such pleasure. Such joy. You were the best thing since sliced bread. You were such delicious sliced bread. We were as happy together as any twosome could be. And then one day I realized the awful truth. Gluten, you were totally and utterly wrong for me.
In a previous life, not that long ago, I could have lived off of bread. I loved sandwiches with the same fervor as Joey Tribbiani. The better the bread, the better sandwich. Macaroni and cheese, especially my Mimi’s homemade recipe, was my favorite. Pizza, cookies, doughnuts and cakes… gluten was my love language.
When I was diagnosed with Psoriatic Arthritis, I began looking into alternative ways to heal my body that didn’t involve scary medications. Research led me to eliminating gluten. The mere whisper of this idea disheartened me greatly. See above paragraph for all things gluten which I adored.
In the days leading up to my inevitable goodbye to gluten, I grieved.
The prospect of removing this from my life sadden me. I knew in my gut this was what I needed to do. I needed to try a gluten free existence to see if I was better off without it. We had run our course. It was that nice guy you genuinely like and enjoy spending time with, but ultimately you know he’s not the one. It was not gluten, it was me.
When I initially stopped eating gluten (along with dairy, refined sugar and oils) I had some withdrawals. Just like breaking up with that boyfriend, I felt bad in the immediate aftermath of cutting gluten out of my life. I had cold like symptoms, headaches, a sore throat and low energy just to name a few. After three days or so the symptoms disappeared and I felt great! Backaches I had been experiencing consistently, which I had attributed to carrying around my one year old all the time, disappeared. Minor but lingering joint pain vanished as well. I had energy. My mind was more clear than it had been in months. I dropped eight pounds. I felt better than I had in over a year. And then, just like a drunken booty call, I allowed gluten to slide back in.
About two months after saying adios to gluten, I decided to eat a little. It was right around my birthday. I was feeling good and felt like I could treat myself. After having some pizza and beer I didn’t feel terrible. I had some slight stomach discomfort, but overall I did not feel that bad. So I let that ex creep back in. I entertained gluten a little bit more. After all, what would it hurt? It hadn’t always been bad with gluten.
Have you ever had a relationship where you knew the person wasn’t right for you, but you just. couldn’t. let. go? That was gluten for me.
One thing about me is I tend to go all in. That little bit of gluten turned back into a full blown relationship. It was so nice to revisit old food friends. I adopted the mindset of, “I’ll start eating clean again tomorrow.” Tomorrow turned into the next day, then the next, then the next. I was almost right back where I started. Feeling crappy while my body gave me clear indications that this was not good for me.
So you’re probably asking why gluten is so bad. And the truth is, it’s not bad for everyone. Although I personally think we, as a society, eat waaaaaay more gluten than we should, more that our bodies are meant to consume, it doesn’t give everyone the problems I experienced. My particular pain points are inflammation, swelling and pain in my joints, foggy brain, anxiety, irritability and a general sense of feeling down. I also experienced stomach bloat and discomfort during my latest flirtation with gluten.
For those of us living with autoimmune disease, gluten may be a key factor in our wellness. Eliminating gluten should be a serious consideration if you have been diagnosed with an autoimmune disease, or if you happen to be suffering from a “mysterious illness.” I say “mysterious illness” because in so many cases of autoimmune disease, you know something is not right, but you can’t seem to get to the bottom of it. Doctor after doctor, specialists galore and you still have few to no answers.
Gluten can cause leaky gut. Leaky gut is a funny name, but it causes serious problems. In very basic terms, our intestines have cellular structures called tight junctions that allow teeny tiny molecules (i.e. nutrients) into the body. In a normal, healthy person, the tight junctions function properly and all is well. Nutrients get into the body and bad stuff that can harm us does not because the tight junctions act as a filter. In a person with leaky gut, the tight junctions do not remain sealed and this allows larger particles to get through. When this happens, our immune system does not recognize these larger particles as food for our body. Instead, they are seen as intruders which causes our immune system to activate and attack the perceived threat. This is problematic because it causes an inflammatory response. Chronic inflammation is believed to play a large roll in chronic diseases, like autoimmunity.
After some trial and error, I came to the realization that gluten could no longer be a part of my life.
I had given gluten second, third and even forth chances. Gluten didn’t hurt me every time. A few times to took awhile for me to realize the damage allowing gluten back into my life had caused. But the whole time the stone cold truth was glaring me in the face. While gluten and I had had some great times, it was no longer the right fit for me. Something that had once brought me such delight now brought me pain.
I can still taste the suds of an ice cold beer on a scorching Florida summer afternoon. The smell of a good yeasty bread still tickles my fancy and tinges me blue that it is no longer in my wheel house. I miss my Mimi’s mac and cheese on special holidays. It was my go to birthday meal for most of my life. I try to be thankful for the good times. I was able to eat all of my favorite foods for 30+ years. That’s a pretty good run. Not everyone gets that long. And I could still eat those foods. I choose not to though. I know how much better I feel when I don’t eat them. Physically, mentally and emotionally I am better off without gluten. It was good while it lasted. Now it’s time to live the rest of my life without you.
For some additional information on gluten’s impact on autoimmune disease, I would recommend reading this article. It is a simplified explanation and I found it incredibly helpful. https://www.huffpost.com/entry/4-reasons-gluten-and-autoimmune-disease-dont-mix_b_599c7abfe4b0521e90cfb5a3
*DISCLAIMER: I am not a doctor or health care professional. I am not licensed, nor qualified, to give medical or nutritional advice. My posts are not meant to diagnose or treat. I am sharing my experience as someone who has suffered with and continues to live with autoimmune disease. Please consult with a doctor or nutritionist for any medical needs and/or questions.*
